Noah Urban’s role in the notorious Scattered Spider gang was talking people into unwittingly giving criminals access to sensitive computer systems.
Between the money bag and clown emojis, the lmfaos and the loooools, a pixelated thumbnail of a teenager covered in blood appeared in a Telegram group chat on a September afternoon in 2022. Noah Urban, then an 18-year-old living in Palm Coast, Florida, clicked play.
He watched as the kid in the video begged him to transfer $200,000 to his captors, who were holding guns to his head. “Elijah, for real bro, you know we used to work together in the past,” the boy said, addressing Noah by one of his aliases. His face was swollen, his mouth full of blood trickling onto a white Hollister sweatshirt. “You know I’ve got your back. Just let me know. I’ll do whatever you want.”
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Comments
By hermannj314 2025-09-2222:395 reply It seems to me the kid is going to be out around the time he is 30, most likely has many millions stashed away the Feds never discovered, and he will do fine.
If I have learned anything in the last two decades, crime does indeed pay, the risk is absolutely worth the reward, and there is almost no long-term reputational damage from dedicating yourself to this sort of life.
He is going to land on his feet and live a life better than most of us too scared to break the rules.
By CobrastanJorji 2025-09-2223:081 reply Although I suspect many people would consider it a great deal, I personally would not be willing to spend the entirety of my 20s in prison in exchange for a good chance at getting away with $10 million after that, and I do not consider this an example of someone winning.
The folks who stole millions online doing crypto shenanigans or whatever and whom you have not heard of, they won. But not this guy.
By SoftTalker 2025-09-233:252 reply I’m not sure I agree. Life is much easier after you turn 30. And easier still after 40. In your 20s most people think of you as a kid.
The reason it gets easier after 30 is largely because of what you learned. It's easier to find a job because you have an employment history, a set of work-related skills, and some connections you can lean on. It's easier to manage money because you know what to not spend it on. It's easier to get into a stable relationship because you learned from the teenage drama. And on, and on.
Getting to the level of a well-adjusted 30-yo is much harder if you're spending that time behind bars.
By SoftTalker 2025-09-2316:10 Yeah to some degree. But your brain isn't really mature until around age 25. But I agree, spending that time in prison would limit your experiences in an unnatural way.
Most criminal hackers would probably be in a rather low-security prison situation however, with some access to books and learning opportunities, maybe even work release etc.
By pengaru 2025-09-2322:08 > In your 20s most people think of you as a kid
After prison people think of you as a convict, regardless of age. That doesn't generally make life easier.
By dash2 2025-09-232:07 If you call cheating, lying and working for criminals a “good life” then yeah, sure.
By mrheosuper 2025-09-234:091 reply this heavily assume that prison does not affect you in anyway even after spending decades inside it.
By qingcharles 2025-09-2517:55 It affects you after a day. After a decade you will never fully recover. It definitely changes you.
By sciencejerk 2025-09-230:052 reply Did you read the full article? Hackers found Noah's previous address and threw bricks through the window. He was lucky -- other harassment attacks of this nature included bullets fired at houses. Noah's hacker friend was abuducted on a street with a black hood over his face and later beaten and tied on a stake.
Noah might come out ahead financially, sure. But it looks like he might have snitched on people for a lesser sentence, and we all know that snitches get stiches.
What I'm confused about is why Noah just didn't stop while he was ahead. Looks like he was a millionare years ago and had plenty of chances to stop
By whatshisface 2025-09-232:21 It's really simple. People stop behaviors when they receive negative reinforcement, not when they receive positive reinforcement.
By justusthane 2025-09-232:25 It’s hard to quit when you’re ahead when you think you can keep winning.
By stickfigure 2025-09-230:571 reply This is mostly false.
* Nobody died in the capital bombings.
* Two former Weather Underground members became professors, and they were very controversial at the time
* Mainstream liberals and Democrats rejected the radicals rather than embracing them.
* In Quebec, the violent FLQ didn't come to power. The peaceful PQ did.
* The Québécois democratically chose the official language of their province. The majority are Francophone.
Chatgpt makes it so damn easy to fact check bullshit online. I love it.
By commandersaki 2025-09-2223:271 reply The following evening, Noah rang from jail. He said he wished he hadn’t hurt his family, or his victims, but he seemed hopeful that the friendships he made would endure.
His family will probably be there for him, but his friends, likely criminal associates, will disband either because he is caught or they are.
By MisterTea 2025-09-232:06 Maybe and maybe not. Even gangsters who worked together and were caught will still keep in touch. Though sometimes they legally can't. I know a guy who keeps in touch with whoever is still alive from his crew, though sparingly for reasons.
By contingencies 2025-09-2222:002 reply "I need the full database for an audit", said nobody legitimate, ever. Great job Twilio manager.
By Aeolun 2025-09-233:14 Except every audit firm that’s ever passed by my company. Like, the reason these requests get honored is because people have been conditioned to think madness is normal.
By CobrastanJorji 2025-09-2223:09 See also, the Department of Government Efficiency.
